I get asked this question a lot, so I have compiled 5 Tips to know if this
person might be “The One” for you. Selecting a spouse may be one of the most
important decisions you will ever make! This decision affects you and many
others in your life for years. The emotional destruction I have seen when families
are in turmoil and the harm that comes to the children breaks my heart.
1. Tip #1- Pray About It
No matter what you believe regarding the existence of there being what some
call a ‘soul mate,’ it is absolutely essential to pray over your relationship. God is
your best resource for attaining the answers and wisdom you need and seek.
Talk to Him about your hopes, dreams, desires, but earnestly seek after what His
will is for your life. It’s easy to ask God to give us what we want, but make sure to
ask and be willing to pursue what He wants for us. He knows us better than we
know ourselves, so His plan and will is always the perfect one. Jeremiah 29:11
says, ‘‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans to prosper
you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’’
Seek His will, ask for His direction and wisdom, and be willing to accept whatever
that is. That takes faith, a listening ear, and a true understanding of and belief in
His promises and Word.
2. Tip # 2-Seek Godly Counsel
God gives us our support system to help us navigate the journey of life.
Everyone’s situation is different, but most of us have a family member, friend,
spouse or significant other, or pastor that we can go to for some godly advice.
It’s important to have people around us that are trustworthy, have a
relationship with Christ, and honest.
3. Tip# 3-Be Honest
One of the biggest problems that plague relationships is a lack of honesty.
Both parties are often on best behavior, which is fine, but at times it is taken
to the point of dishonesty. Instead of being an authentic version of
themselves, they pretend to be who they think that special guy or gal wants
them to be.
4. Tip# 4-Ask
Are you and the person you are dating a good match? Emotions come and go
and your vision is clouded by drugs and movies. Drugs: The endorphins and
dopamine that signals pleasure to your brain when you are in the romantic
phase of love. Movies: Each one of you holds a camera pointed at each other
with your version of “my perfect man or my perfect woman” movies playing.
You don’t hear the snoring, belches or sarcastic comments. You don’t see the
dirty clothes lying on the floor next to the clothes hamper or smell the burnt
dinner.
The best way to start answering that question is to start asking questions.
Explore your interests, hopes, goals, beliefs, etc. Ask questions like:
- Where do you want to live?
- What do you hope to accomplish in the next 5, 10, 15 years?
- Do you believe that marriage is for life?
- How do you envision the husband and wife roles looking like?
- What are your favorite hobbies?
- What do you hope to give and gain from marriage?
- How many kids do you want?
- How were you raised?
- What type of parenting style do you ascribe to?
- Do you think a wife should be a stay-at-home mom?
5. Tip # 5- Prepare
Preparation is such an important part of a successful marriage as well as
the process of deciphering if the person you are with is the one you want
to spend the rest of your life with. There are so many resources (like the
one you are viewing now) that are available to help guide you through the
various premarital stages of life.
If you are at this important stage of your life, don’t take a chance. Call today
and speak to a Family Unity Specialist @ 619-884-0601
