Sex is play. It is celebration—the glue that keeps a relationship together during difficult times. However, keeping that sexual spark alive in a marriage or a long-term relationship can be a challenge. Sometimes life takes us over and like a wet blanket, stress smothers the spark. But couples that take the time to cultivate a loving and tender relationship will reap the reward of feeling more connected. These couples also tend to be more physically healthy!
Take the quiz below to find out if you have a thriving sex life!
Answer True or False:
1. My partner and I communicate in an open and loving manner about most things that matter to us.
2. I am able to articulate my sexual needs to myself. I know what I like and what I don’t like.
3. I communicate those likes and dislikes to my partner. I don’t expect him or her to “just know” how to please me.
4. Without judgment or embarrassment, I talk openly and fearlessly with my partner about my thoughts and feelings about sex.
5. I share my sexual hopes, dreams, and aspirations in an intimate manner with my partner.
6. I avoid making assumptions about what does and doesn’t turn on my partner. I ask for feedback and guidance.
7. Experimentation and play are key elements in my sexual relationship.
8. I have realistic expectations of my partner and I avoid being overly demanding.
9. I enjoy having sex with my partner on a regular basis.
10. I look forward to having sex with my partner and do not see it as a chore or obligation.
11. My partner and I make time for sex and don’t allow it to end up on the back burner.
12. I leave unexpected notes and surprise gifts for my partner.
13. Foreplay is an integral part of my sex life.
14. My partner and I are able to embrace and incorporate each other’s turn-ons in a healthy and loving manner.
If you marked true on most of the questions, your sex life is likely healthy and vibrant. If you marked “false” on most of the questions, don’t worry. Cultivating a loving sexual relationship with your partner is possible. Jack Morin, author of The Erotic Mind, recommends that couples hone their communication skills as a first step towards a healthy sex life. For more information or to discuss your responses to this quiz, call The Center for Family Unity at 619-884-0601
